Finally could breathe

I just moved into the apartment a few days back and most of the things have been sorted out about the shifting procedures. I recently just bought an Epiphone acoustic guitar 2 days ago and yesterday, I finally went to rehearse with Eevon and Alvin at Alvin's house. It was alright, managed to cover up 4 out of 12 songs in a day. A bit more longer of practice then we're set to go. And on the same day, I got an Ibanez acoustic amp. And I couldn't be more happier. Ibanez RG321MH (you're next).

It was an OKAY rehearsal for a first time for me to practice with a band. And the practicing session atmosphere was cool. Alvin had the whole set of instruments (including piano and drums). And it was fun, after acoustic practice, the 3 of us went playing drums and electric guitars. Jammed on 'Master of puppets' on guitars and vocals, I could actually scream, but without the mic, it seemed kinda hard to hear myself. Now I know why bands stay commited (well...not all). It's fun playing music together once the musicianship is there. Next week, we'll be rehearsing at Von's place. Hope this gig works out for us.

Shifting is the 'hell' among jobs. It kinda ticks your life a lot. And the packing is worse than the moving. But in a split second (and with a blink of an eye) everything is over. After my shift, I really wanna build my own jam/recording studio so that I won't be paying the jam sessions in a public studio.

Music Tag Survey

The Music Shuffle Meme
1. Put your iTunes/ music player/ phone on Shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must put down the song name no matter what.

After you’ve answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and then let them know they’ve been tagged to the meme themselves.
*******************
1.What would best describe your personality?
Pantera-Walk

2.What do you like in a guy/girl?
Mr Big-Just Take My Heart

3.How do you feel today?
Richie Kotzen-Go Faster

4.What is your life's purpose?
Slipknot-Psychosocial

5.What is your motto?
Slipknot-All hope is gone

6.What do your friends think of you?
Joe Satriani-The Extremist

7.What do you think of your parents?
Lost Prophets-Tonight

8.What do you think about very often?
KORN-Blind

9.What do you think of your best friend?
Deep Purple-Smoke on the water

10.What do you think of your crush?
Mr Big-To be with you

11.What is your life story?
Stone Sour-30/30-150

12.What do you want to be when you grow up?
Dream Theater-The Dark Eternal Night

13.What do you think when you see your crush?
Mr Big-Green Tinted Sixties Mind

14.What do your parents think of you?
Lost Prophets-Rooftops

15.What do strangers think of you?
Metallica-Nothing Else Matters

16.What will they play at your funeral?
Avenged Sevenfold-Afterlife

17.What will you dance to at your wedding?
Mr Big-Nothing But Love

18.What is your hobby/interest?
Trivium-The Anthem

19.What do you think of your friends?
Avenged Sevenfold-Almost Easy

20.What song do you listen to when you are sad?
Trivium-Sadness Will Sear

21.What song do you air guitar to?
Lost Prophets-Shinobi vs Dragon Ninja

22.What should be your signature karaoke song?
Metallica-Master Of Puppets


23.What is your greatest desire?
David Cook-Time Of My Life

24.What does next year have in store for you?
Lamb Of God-Redneck

25.What's your outlook on life?
Slipknot-Surfacing

26.How will you die?
Avenged Sevenfold-Seize the day

27.Do people secretly lust after you?
Nine Inch Nails-Sunspots

28.The best advice you will ever get
Shadows Fall-Inspiration On Demand


29.What will I be doing for the next 3 months?
Yngwie Malmsteen-Far Beyond The Sun

30.What do you think of the person who tagged you?
Enya-Long long journey

31.What will your future mother-in-law be like?
Bullet For My Valentine-Waking the demon

32.What is the favourite song of the doctor who will help deliver your baby?
Mr Big-Daddy, brother, lover, little boy

33.If you wrote a book, what would it be about?
Nickelback-Photograph

34.What sort of world ruler would you be?
Linkin Park-Shadow Of The Day

35.Will you ever get a dog or cat?
Lobo-Me and you and a dog named Boo

36.What would you say at your Oscar/Nobel prize acceptance speech?
Metallica-Sad But True

37.What is your superpower?
Slipknot-Heretic Anthem/555 666

38.Why are you attracted to enigmatic brooders?
Slipknot-New Abortion

Now, I shall tag Alvinkei and Tabby

A trick from the bug system

The use of bug systems can not only be annoying, but they can seriously be useful. For instance, like using a debug trick on a computer game. Here's a demonstration of Final Fantasy's bug trick. Enjoy. Final Fantasy fans would be impressed with this..

Time planning complexity can be the uber suck...

This has got to be crazy. I would have to rehearse with Alvin and Eevon for the Rotaract Fellowship acoustic gig which starts on the 16th of August. Plus, I need to find myself an acoustic guitar to rehearse with the both of them, time to time. Besides that, I would have to move in to the apartment by the 27th of July. Luckily we just have to bring our bags, fridge, oven and the computer as well. Rehearsals start on next Thursday and I need a new guitar fast. Turns out, we have to play 60 minutes of music for the event. So here's the plan, we rotate in between. Meaning that each of us becomes a lead vocalist at around 5 songs each and that should be long enough to cover the whole hour. But what about practice time while we're at it? At least I'm free during the weekdays and so are they. So, it shouldn't be a problem.

My first full length gig, how awesome is that? I certainly need to make that moment spectacular. By next Thursday, Alvin and I MUST go shop for an acoustic guitar. Here is the overall set list that we're still in decision to play


16th aug @ subang rotaract installation (15SONGS NEEDED)
WE ARE THE SINNERS
-VON
-Static Spike
-AVK

POOL OF SONGS:
1 im yours
2 mungkin nanti
3 yue liang dai biao wo de xin
4 yesterday
5 umbrella
6 you and me
7 a mi manero
8 to be with you
9 bad day
10 bubbly
11 more than words
12 apologize
13 with you
14 empty
15 through her eyes
16 the river
17 stand by me
18.Nothing else matters
LEAD VOCALS:

VON:
fool to cry-Rolling stones
home-Daughtry
i will follow you in the dark-death cab for cutie
more than words-extreme
can't help fallin in love-elvis presley

Jie Juan:
circle-Slipknot
through her eyes-Dream Theater
be with you-Mr Big
nothing else matters-Metallica
you and me-Lifehouse

AVK:
mungkin nanti-peter pan
tears- Japanese song
a mi manero-Spanish song
i'm yours-Jason Mraz

special request : birthday song + auld lang syne

DRESS CODE: SMART CASUAL

WE NEED: 3 MIC, 3 MIC STANDS

The Avalanches of life..

It's been 5 stressful days this week, still packing and placing boxes everywhere to prepare for the shift. But I have to admit, this must be one of the biggest sacrifices I've made so far with my personal time and space to begin with. But hey, things have to be done before they could be laid aside right? But anyways, just 5 more days to go and I'll get a month's break from packing. Yes, why 1 month? Because my dad was thinking of moving the things over to the new house while we're staying at an apartment that my dad's friend owns in Old Klang Road, because of inconvenient timing caused by other issues.

And nothing is more worse than my grandma demanding and nagging at me to carry more heavy loads, rather than to say,"Good morning" or any other daily greetings you get each time once you get out of bed every morning. I don't know why that sets my temper really high, but I guess when things get a bit negatively funny, I react anger towards it..because it is just wrong? That's how my parents brought me up. That is, to be well mannered wherever you go, but if people piss me off..that would just be a different ball game. Of course, I know my grandma is already so old..but sometimes things aren't the way they're supposed to be, because there are some cracks within the whole family of mine (Not my immediate family of course). That is why, I don't write much about my relatives.

Well, call me bitter..but I'm a conservative person. I'm a person who keeps his own word. But I wouldn't simply make promises for myself but I tend to make attempts of doing things I plan to do and try to achieve it, if it doesn't work out, I'll try again. There is no success without failure, so why 100% guarantee a promise? Chances are, it's hard to keep. Verbally speaking and signing off with body languages, whoever dares to change me for who I am, trust me..it's hard to change my qualities because I'm not a follower, but neither I refer myself as a leader. But I lead my own life than to help lead some others. But I'm always a helping hand for those who I think deserve to have. Now that's not a positive or negative thing, but that reward has to be earned. No wonder there's a thing called 'Reputation' for people.

Maybe it is to ensure myself that I won't be taken for granted. It's just to be able to save my own skin and make my life much more fulfilled rather than to let what others think of me. Attention seeking is never my style. It's a senseless sympathetic way of saying,"Look what's up with my life. I can't take it anymore, I need to grasp onto hope and await my future". I think that's rather 'emo' in that sense. So, what's a hard life then? To me, it's either you're looking out for more difficulty or if you don't want it, you could solve it accordingly and hijack yourself from it after that. Sure, the crappy stuff tends to sustain at some period of time, but I guess the level of tolerance determines how strong you are. What I would do is just sing a song. :D. That's life.

As they say,"Step YO game up!"

Psychosocial

New slipknot video guys, a debut video from their upcoming album 'All Hope Is Gone'. Here's 'Psychosocial'..


Slipknot-Psychosocial

Of Prosthetics And Living Souls: The Dawn Of A New Era (The view of a spiritual atheist)

Well, it seems like the world has changed dramatically throughout the centuries ever since mankind started out the rise of civilization and the set on civil rules to maintain peace and harmony on Earth. They said God created us, do you side Darwin's Evolutionary theory? Sometimes I do wonder why Dinosaurs were never stated in the Bible. Religious values that add so-called enhancement in our daily lives to follow what we've been told of. Taken from the inspired explanations of the 'Zeitgeist' documentary, part of it says that man has been mislead without paying heed to what the truth is and what is not, or despite to conclude of what is right or wrong without the much use of rationality. Cavemen started out right after the extinction of Dinosaurs. Don't you think cells created us? Was the bible ever meant for social control. How sure are they about a place called 'Hell'? When people die, they can't tell you where they are after that. How sure is the book that hell ever exists?


"They must find it difficult...Those who have taken authority as the truth, Rather than the truth as the authority",-Gerald Massey, Egyptologist

This is where religion falls into place. What do some people do when they have the edge of breaking down? They turn to the 'book' and find their sense of belonging till they begin to be convinced that there's an invisible man in the sky, watching over them and circulating over the sun, while he pours his love over them and teaches them the real view of what life is all about, praying that that man would solve their problems with his own hands (Why can't man just help themselves?). Yet, will send them to the depths of hell if they ever committed sinful acts. Why should we feel limited or worried towards these issues, while we could reconcile those mistakes or wrong doings and start over as fresh-minded humans? FYI, Buddha never called himself 'God'. He was a teacher..

Doesn't it just lay burden on our shoulders? Regret is part of karma which are the wonders of the universe with divine presence. But feeling insecure for the matter regarding religion is never an option for something that is unproven or unforeseen (god)? It proves that it is such a crutch for the weak minded who just follow and not make real choices of their own, and yet to follow the conditions of whatever it may lead to, upon the exaggerated claims...religion.

In the tradition of nontheism (agnosticism) however, it is very direct that the case history are not particularly important. What is particularly important, is 'here' and 'now'. We try experiencing what is available there, on the spot. There's no point in taking the past with us as it doesn't exist of what we could have NOW. We are always interacting with such intelligence to make reality checks on what we are interacting around us in this world, unconditionally. We could never invite the past into the future. That conclusion opposes the reasons why we; seek religion, have war and complain to society. I bet this a secular humanist could explain..

"Spirituality....is particular term which actually means; 'A dealing with intuition."
-Chogyam Trungpa Minpoche-

Here's an interesting research on very similar attribute claims of how described gods came about.

Horus

Egyptian god of 3000 BC

-Born of a virgin on December 25th
-Star in the East
-Adored by 3 Kings
-Teacher at 12
-Baptized/Ministry at 30
-12 Disciples
-Performed miracles such as; Healing the sick and walking on water
-Referred to as 'The Light'/"Lamb Of God"
-Crucified/Dead For 3 Days/Resurrected

Attis

Greece-1200 BC

-Born of a virgin on December 25th
-Crucified/dead for 3 days/ resurrected

Krishna

India-900 BC

-Born of a virgin with the star of the East
-Performed miracles with his disciples
-Upon his death, he was resurrected

Dionysus

Greece-500 BC

-Born of a virgin on December 25th
-Was a traveling teacher who performed miracles such as turning water into wine
-Referred to as "King of kings", "Alpha and Omega"
-He was resurrected upon his death

Mithra

Persia-1200 BC

-Born of a virgin on December 25th
-Had 12 disciples
-Performed miracles
-Dead for 3 days and thus resurrected
-Referred to as "The Light", "The truth" and many others
-Worship day was Sunday

Jesus Christ


-Born of a virgin on December 25th
-Star in the East
-12 Disciples
-Performed miracles
-Dead for 3 days and thus was resurrected

There are numerous of these saviors of different periods from all over the world, with these attributes in common. Question remains, why these attributes? Why the virgin birth on December 25th? Why death for 3 days and thus resurrected? Why 12 disciples? The birth sequences were totally astrological.

"Sirius" was known as "The Star Of The East". On December 24th, aligns with the 3 brightest stars known as 'Orions Belt'. Those 3 stars of Orions Belt are what they are called in ancient times, 'The Three Kings'. Both of these which point out the direction of the sunrise on December 25th. This is why the 'The Three Kings' follow the star of the east, to locate the sunrise. The birth of the Sun.


This is not the christian cross which you see on top of churches, it is known as a crux. The pagan adaptation of the Zodiac cross.

A deeper reference can be looked through from the Zeitgeist documentary.

"We don't wanna be unkind or cause hurt to anybody but just wanna be factual and academically correct on what we understand and known to be true. Christianity, just not based on truth.",-Jordan Maxwell


May the force be with you..

A player's personal point of view..

I just came back from a Duran feast at my father's friend's place. Had done the chores and started packing a little, preparing to shift to Puchong Hartamas in 2 weeks time. After that, I started shredding again on my classical guitar. Something was wrong though, the strings were not close to the fretboard. Of course, it can only mean the action of the axe. From the bridge to the nut, point A to point B. The tone was not as pleasant as before even with rusted strings or fresh strings, it seemed pretty dull. I need to send over to the music store tomorrow for service. I can't bare the discomfort when playing licks and scales.

Many people tend to think that practicing hard and being a good player would be able to handle any bad or good guitar. Well, that my friend...is absolutely wrong. When I play, I personally want comfort out of my fretboard to get great playability. Most professional and touring concert artists now insist the guitar to play very well, to be a friendly ally with the demands of guitar performance. This is true for amateur players as well. It's always best to befriend with an instrument than to use it as a 'weapon' to rock on. If it ever fails you in playing, you may hate it sometimes. So I guess that's why set up services are always important.

My 'baby' has been with me on and off stages for quite a while and from last month, I've realized I've been playing with an unbalanced saddle all this while. How crazy is that, maybe once the 'hearing' of tones gets to mature, maybe that's how I get to notice..

Those days were gone..

Metallica, who has never heard of that band before? The legends during the 80's who've sparked excitement in metal heads and mosh pit candidates at pubs and concerts. Back when James Hetfield was in his mid-20's and he could ripoff awesome vocal chords in metal history..but now, he sounds great but not as great as before (Due to age). No matter how old Metallica are, they are still the godfathers of Heavy Metal. And they'd kick anybodies butt with their music..

Here is Metallica's 'Master Of Puppets'


As we all would like to quote part of the lyrics from the song,"MASTER! MASTER! Master of puppets I'm pulling your strings! Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams!"

Barricade

I've been away for a few days because I had made a trip down to Penang with my family to visit a few people we're close with. Nothing much, we just went around Penang and started looking for food. Fried Koay Teow, Fried Oyster, 'Loh Bak', you name it! Plus side of things, we went there to run a few errands here and there which I wish not to say. The journey on the way was horrendous and the long distance was testing my patience, but nothing more than to sleep in the car to make the time fly till we got there. Well, the burger stalls at the roadsides are great. You can get the kind of patty which is way bigger than the ones back home for the same price. Food quality? In my opinion it's way better than most KL hawker centers these days. But that's the only great thing about Penang, just the food. And also the vast sea shores.

I'm currently looking for an acoustic guitar with a preamp pickup. My budget is up to RM500 or more, any of you readers who wants to sell your acoustic guitar, please let me know :D. Probably a Yamaha, Ibanez or a Takamine. Thanks. Has to be mint or 9/10 condition

Venom Rain (The Melt Method)

A lyric I've worked on these couple of days...enjoy reading it :D

Band:The Melt Method
Song:Venom Rain

(Verse)

A pa-ra-site! You've seeded with ease

Don't know how to handle your disease!

This abuse seems so constrained

Judging that you're so insane!

(This cuts!) my life in half

Dry it up and there's nothing left

Leaving blood signs down a path

Sticking in ;"psychopathic, mandatory, satisfactory"

(F***!) This is enough!

Take that garbage and throw it out!

What can you find right in this stream!?

Is this what you're feeding!?

(Chorus)

I can't seem to stand your miseries

It seems to break me so miserably

You can't seem to see yourself already!

You may as well just-affect me!

Why can't you just come and kill me!?

Venom rain! (x5)


(Verse)

Shut off the system and reject the lies!

Ever thought you were by my side..

Witness the sodomy and start blaming somebody!

The 7 deadly sins

That never been forbid

Doesn't it make you sick?

Where does the justice system hold?

What could've made us turn so cold?

Would we make the nation split and divide!?

Or are we just gonna stare and walk by!?

(F***!) This is enough!

Take that garbage and throw it out!

What can you find right in this stream!?

Is this what you're seeking!?

(Chorus)

I can't seem to stand your miseries

It seems to break me so miserably

You can't seem to see yourself already!

You may as well just-affect me!

Why can't you just come and kill me!?

Venom rain! (x5)


(Bridge)

Make it discontinue!

The rectifying problem still tends to grow

Is it the end of the road!?

It's the end of everything that we hold!!!!!??

I would never die, please shed some LIGHT! x2



(Chorus)

I can't seem to stand your miseries

It seems to break me so miserably

You can't seem to see yourself already!

You may as well just-affect me!

Why cant' you just come and kill me!? x2

Venom Rain! (x5)

Most expensive guitar in the world

Credits to http://most-expensive.net/

“Blackie”, Eric Clapton’s favorite mid-career modified Strat has been surpassed in value and is no longer the most expensive guitar ever, despite that it was bought for $950,000 USD in 2004 by a guitar archaeologist.

The latest most expensive electric guitar in the world dethroned its predecessor at an auction in Doha, Qatar on November 16th, 2005. The Strat was signed by several rock musicians to benefit a tsunami charity, ‘Reach out to Asia’. It was bought one year ago by Qatar’s royal family for a million dollars and donated back to the Asia Program, bringing in $2.7 million USD at the more recent auction, whose attendees included Former President Bill Clinton. Technically, the guitar has generated a total of $3.7 million USD, making it the most expensive guitar yet.

Signees of this expensive electric guitar included Mick Jagger, Keith Richards, Eric Clapton, Brian May, Jimmy Page, David Gilmour, Jeff Beck, Pete Townsend, Mark Knopfler, Ray Davis, Liam Gallagher, Ronnie Wood, Tony Iommi, Angus & Malcolm Young, Paul McCartney, Sting, Ritchie Blackmore, Def Leppard, and Bryan Adams, the coordinator of the project.

Survey

1.What do you want the most now?

Get a new acoustic guitar and gig my heart out and grow as an aspiring musician

2.Who is the person you trust the most?
My sister

3.Are you in love?
With someone, go figure.

4.If you have a dream come true..
Being able to travel around the world playing live concerts with my favourite bands.

5.Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
Of course!


6.What's your goal for this year?
Accomplish the things I've planned for this year.

7.Do you believe in eternity?
Eternity exists in our soul, not in our physical selves

8.Have you ever broken a person's heart that he/she wanted to commit suicide?
Never.

9.What feeling do you love the most?
Satisfaction in the sense of accomplishment.

10.What are the requirements for your other half?
Someone who is really understanding. Knows what is best for herself and I in life, so that complications won't occur. Someone who I can really talk to about ANYTHING (I think I
found the one), supports me in doing my passion. And being able to treat each other well.


11.What kind of feeling do you hate the most?
Anger, I lose control over it and it's BAD. But I'm trying to control it..

12.Do you cherish every friendship of yours?
Only good friendship, because it usually lasts.


13.What do you want to do in the future?
Open up my own restaurant, managing two jamming studios and take my chances on being successful in the music business

14.What is the most important thing in your life?
Family.

15. How did you feel last night?
Tired.

16.Who do you hope to be always there for you?
I'm independent and I'm my own man, I don't always have to depend on people.

17.When do you think the world will end ?
Someday, when the whole world is mismanaged

18.The world ends tomorrow. What will you do?
Organize a big gig to perform for the last time with a band, spend time with family, and kiss the girl I'm liking now.

19.What do you think of the person that tagged you?
A very nice and kind person..:D

20.What do you want to know right now?
What life has to offer me as I go along..

Rise from the ashes...

Nothing much really, today I just went to watch 'The Incredible Hulk' alone in the cinema. Pretty good movie. Anyways, I'm not here to explain my experience towards the movie. Alvin just invited me for an acoustic session gig at Subang Parade next month. Cool, haven't been gigging for more than a year. The last time I gigged was in school, performing for teacher's day as a flamenco soloist. I'm willing to do this gig without an occurrence of obligation. Let's see, two guitarist/vocalist and a bass player. Should be enough, I guess a latin percussion would not hurt as well, that's the sensation of unplugged gigs. It's actually a rotaract fellowship gathering at the Coca Restaurant, if we perform, we get free dinner. Well, time to work on my guitar chops and practice some songs.

What it's like being on stage? It feels like you 'own' the world in some way for some period of time and the crowd cheers you on if you did a good job. After the show, you feel like you've accomplished a great thing (If you do well). Like William Shakespear once said,"All the worlds a stage". Words of wisdom from the great poet. I'm thinking Metallica's 'Nothing Else Matters', Dream Theater's 'Through Your Eyes' and maybe Lifehouse's 'You and me'. Even when performing as a soloist shredder, it does give a sense of sensation when the crowd is in aw and it does feel good, but to me personally, it gets really repetitive and boring when you start to mature in the music line. Well, that's what I think of it. But singing while playing the guitar has a different feel, choose the songs that mean to you the most and the vent of feelings in your soul towards the melodies would give a great value of beautifying the heart inside.

I DO wanna step onto the stage with blinding spot lights with my fellow partners and embrace the spirit of gigging in the good name of music. The time is NOW and not later. Well, I think it's a good opportunity to practice at home and get out there and get used to performing live. I remember the time I stood up on the school stage, while forming the classical guitar playing pose and started playing, I couldn't really see the crowd. And I felt ashamed because I want to see the expressions and feelings that the 'sea' of people till the back end had.

Here's Metallica's 'Nothing Else Matters'.

The power within...

Finally, my dad got to change our desktop monitor from our old bulky Samsung monitor to a BenQ 19" flat screen monitor while we were in Low Yat. Anti-radiation and it's pretty clear. Turns out now, that Low Yat has two or more IT Hypermarket stores. Pretty neat, good deals and all. And the price for CPU's these days are pretty reasonable considering the specifications they have now compared to the prices back then. Even setting up a budget custom desktop is better, 30% cheaper I suppose.

*To readers who have read this post earlier, price revised. Credits to my friend, MXV*

Core 2 Duo compatible motherboard- RM280
Core 2 Duo Processor-RM370+
Nvidia Geforce 8-400+
1GB DDR2 RAM-RM50
19" monitor-Rm570
Casing-Free
DVD driver x20-RM195
160gb Hard Drive-RM120
Grand Total: roughly around RM1415 (Before discount and without monitor)
With Monitor cost-RM1985

Ain't that bad (it was bad before, from my miscalculations) of a deal compared to the retail ready-made computers that are displayed in stores. But I guess it offers more spending power to gamers and recording artists. Even after investing recording gear for digital music production work, it's still a valuable deal and maximum utility would last for years to come. If only AMD did not have their quick heating processor problem (This may be a rumor), it could save us money. But hopefully those computer parts would come cheaper in years to come...wouldn't it be convenient?

Girls....

(Sorry for the bad photoshop editing, I'm not a wiz at it)

This turns out to be the very first topic that I'll be writing about among all of my posts.

'Girls'..right.

Well, you may or may not be able to tell that I'm never a lady's man. To tell you the truth, I may never know the answer myself. But I've never gotten a serious girlfriend before, but so what right? Fears of being a future bachelor? (That's mandatory for the loners), desperate for finding a girl? (That's for people who got nothing better to do) .

In this, most of us 'Guys' know that girls are very mysterious in their own ways, till you wish to swim inside their heads to find out what they think about you. Sure, there are some desperate chicks out there who pray to someday find a hunk such as Brad Pitt :S. But of course, if some girls can be so picky about guys, yeah why can't we (guys) do the same, right? But in MY point of view, why can't a girl just sit down and analyze a guy and find something unique about him?
Yeah, I guess I've done it many times to ensure on whom I'm mixing with.

From my own personal experience, I've been through so many heart breaks till I've suddenly became immune to it. I never knew what their ulterior motives were. In fact, they've always wanted to know about me and it's awkward if I ask them a question about them, they'll just sweep the answers under the carpet. I honestly don't know what my flaws are, but if I know that I talk too much about myself, but I guess that's how I take questions and answer them. I'll keep them short this time.

Maybe they're looking for someone fun loving and always chirpy. Unlike me, I'll always end up cautious and maybe a bit serious. But I'm trying to be fun loving and chirpy? :D. Maybe it's for the fact that I've liked so many kinds of girls but I end up get turned down by them. Maybe they were not the right companion for me? Maybe they expect too much out of me? I've always wanted to find the answers to these questions. Those are the reasons why I'm so cautious, not that I'm afraid of rejection.

A lot of aunties and uncles tell me that I'm decent, handsome(not being vain or too full of myself) and really nice. And one aunt asked me,"Why not get a girlfriend as a companion?". I then told her,"I guess I haven't found the right one for me yet." But I guess life is like that, one may never know who they may end up with. But I don't ask for much, just a person with inner and outer beauty. That's all. But I guess life is all about being patient and make something right happen..

Here's Lifehouse's 'Broken'. Enjoy...

Lifehouse-Broken

Never gone..

Well, not too long before I start moving to Puchong Hartamas and start a new life over. It's kinda impressive though, how some people manage to hold their anger and keep it cool as always, whatever the situation. Just like how people like me keep holding on, whenever I have a serious break down. After the passing of Mummy, things have been way different. Sometimes I think I can't accept the change of fate that I have now, but it was for the better and left over of the worse. I can't imagine living the 'normal' life that I had with mum, now that she is not at present.

Yes, all of us try to move on and not look back, but I sort of miss the good old days where there was a real thing called 'family'. It was filled with such laughter and joy that the world can't buy. Nothing can compensate with that, especially when losing a friend (despite death), which I don't give my 2 cents about. Because I've dealt with the most painful memory in my life. But that would never break the bond of this family, because she is never gone.

Whoever walks into our lives do not matter to us, except close relative members and good friends. I'm saying this pretty frankly, because I don't believe in a thing called 'Best friend' in friends but I believe in a thing called 'True friend'. This is where music and love helped me grasp upon my needs to feel happy. That is where my anger insulates and converts into my lyrics. Few days ago, friends that I know had betrayed me behind my back. Thinking that I wouldn't know, but actually..I do. You know, the stood up kinds. There was no need to lash my anger on anybody (or to those kind of people) because that would be utterly senseless and stupid, so then..it gave me so many great ideas on a song that I've been working on for some time and I wrote with my heart out and had thought of so many melodic ideas for it.

At the end of the day, they wouldn't be able to turn back the clock and correct the things that they've done wrong. Ain't that sad? Well...since they're still doing it, they would hurt themselves the most than it would to me. But I guess dumb idiots like that may never realize. Hahaha! Unreasonable backstabbing and despising never gets you anywhere, but it only gives you an excuse to tell yourself,"I'm an asshole!". Well, it takes all kinds to make the world, but it takes all kinds of idiots to ruin the world as well, if we let them.

"Now Im not pretty and Im not cool
But Im fat and Im ugly and proud - so f*** you!",Corey Taylor (Slipknot)

Of Dead leaves and living roots... (by S.Spike)

Long have I seen another day
Or had I just seen another ruthless face
Long have I suffered before you knew
When was the last heart you just threw
Terrible, just terrible as it burns to ashes
And all good karma collapses
Young and naive
Doesn't mean you should leave
Left me hanging
Doesn't mean I'll start forgetting
Long after a time we start shedding like dead leaves
We still contempt with our living roots and be

*This poem is dedicated to those who left their friends that are not worth being with anymore*

Wanted for real...

Well, today I went to watch 'Wanted' with Saiful at UO mall in the evening. It was a pretty good movie. The plot proves to be really impressive. And the great thing about it is that, the movie is really unpredictable (Angelina is..). The special effects are great, the stunts and actions were well coordinated and the story line was pretty good. Wish I could tell you what the movie is all about, but I guess I'll spoil it for you guys (Angelina is..). All in all, superb movie to be exact (Angelina is..). Owh alright! Angelina Jolie was pretty hot in the set. Other than that, it was pretty cool that the movie played the song 'Everyday is exactly the same' by Nine Inch Nails. Yeah, keep playing good music Hollywood! Don't play image music. Well, yes..I'm against 70% of modern mainstream music. Probably because they don't really last that long after a while (IMHO). I wish music was like the 80's or even during 2001, where good bands such as Papa Roach, Crazy Town and etc came about. Thank heavens that 'The Rock Show' exists on Channel V. If you guys wanna watch a real assassin flick, watch 'Wanted'! I believe that the upcoming movies are gonna be a blast for this month. What can I say? Thanks to modern technology and great special effects. :D

Anyway, here's Nine Inch Nails' 'Everyday is exactly the same'