Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Torn between Nemesis and Lethe (1)


This post is known to have a slight amount of explicit content. Reading discretion is adviced..thank you

Yes yes, I may have gotten the idea of this title from Trivium's song 'Torn Between Scylla and Charybdis'. But I'm kinda relating Greek mythology with a few stories of mine with this title. So, yeah. :)

is (nm-ss)
n. pl. nem·e·ses (-sz)
1. A source of harm or ruin: Uncritical trust is my nemesis.
2. Retributive justice in its execution or outcome: To follow the proposed course of action is to invite nemesis.
3. An opponent that cannot be beaten or overcome.
4. One that inflicts retribution or vengeance.
5. Nemesis Greek Mythology The goddess of retributive justice or vengeance.


In life, there's always an enemy that we'll encounter that would well might be our worst. It could be about the most horrible person you've met, the most terrifying experience, or it could well be a certain type of 'self-hate' in ourselves that it could let us end up in suicide.

But on a personal note, I'm relating this definition towards this person I used to have a strong hatred to. This person could be well described as the most; Malicious, two-faced, manipulative, hypocritical son of a bitch I've ever met in my life. *apologies for the language* In the end, he was considered my own personal 'Nemesis'. Let's refer him as a 'Parasite'

For starters, we used to work in the same hotel industry as butlers. The way we got the job was through his uncle, who was one of the head directors of the hotel. When we started out fresh during our first week of the job, there was one event which took place on one of the days within that week. We were having a morning brief with our supervisor on one of the days during that week. And I kept telling myself,"No matter what, I'll be better than this asshole at anytime!". A little bit of ego there, but it was my only way of realizing that I have to believe in myself, no matter what shit comes in my way..

My supervisor gave me a good feedback on my working performance, till he told this 'Parasite' ,"You know, you could try and learn as much from Cheah." But of course I didn't allow my supervisor to say that, upfront showing my humility as I could've lowered his (parasite) self-esteem if I allowed my supervisor to say such things. Since then the 'Parasite' had gone competitive with me on the job, until he felt needed to prove to people what he was capable of just because he wanted to match up with me. I was being told about this by my colleague. Which explains why he chooses to ignore me whenever I try to talk to him or ask him about work. But, I just rose up to the challenge and just be healthy sport and try to do better than him in many ways as I could. If I'm defeated in certain things that he has flair for, I would accept my defeat.

Although there times where my own personal successes didn't suffice and he was under skyrocketing towards his own successes, I couldn't let the feeling of 'envy' get to me. I know that it can slowly kill me one day. I just learned to stick to what I am good at just to get by, up to a point where the world doesn't matter. My only issue was that I never liked the fact the person I hated so much was doing slightly better than me after our days in the hotel industry. But nevertheless, I choose to build my own successes and confidence, instead of whining and pining over this matter.

The situation between the both of us had gotten worse when he started talking behind my back to other people. I didn't see the need for him to do that, but that's when I decided to walk away from the 'Parasite' and let his own hatred eat him up badly. Now I heard he has weight on his shoulder because of something stupid that he did. I would take this as his bad karma and what was shown were his true colours. At least I now know that he only knows how to live his life with full of escapism with the recreation of his own hatred and guilt.

*next post would be in relation to Lethe, stay tuned*

Thursday, June 10, 2010

How 'NOT' To Destroy Angels

I just took a listen to Trent Reznor's latest work and to be honest....I'm not very impressed with it, no matter how much I love Nine Inch Nails. This could probably be one of his works of downfall (No offense to any NIN fans out there). His side project 'How To Destroy Angels' , which consists of band members featuring; Trent Reznor (himself), Mariqueen Maandig (his wife) and Atticus Ross (producer and programmer for Nine Inch Nails).

First, I'll get down with the things I like from the EP album of 'How To Destroy Angels'. By truth, when I listened to the songs, the distorted beats and synthesizers gave me an immediate shower of ideas that it sounds like Nine Inch Nails, only with a female vocalist singing. The haunting reverb on the pianos just sends chills down my spine, the messy (but creative) Synth effects, end up being groovy riffs and loads of percussion-like beats to keep up the musics' intensity. All that makes it sound like, well...Nine Inch Nails.

Now I'll get down to business and tell you about the things that I don't like about the EP. To me, Mariqueen's vocals sound as if she was mumbling or whispering, mostly throughout the whole song called 'The Space In Between'. Sounded as if the instrument tracks were almost masking her voice or something during the Verse of the song. That, in my humble opinion. I just wish that Trent's vocals were also featured in the EP, I bet it would make a great blend into the songs. Well, it's only the EP album so far. I'll wait for the full-length album to be released in the near future and we'll see how that goes.