Saturday, January 03, 2015

Forsake not the dream

It's quite interesting how Life goes for each and every one of us. And probably most (or perhaps all) of us never seem to be contented with everything because we tend to either strive for the better things in Life, or hide in a 'cave' and mope about how shitty our Life is.

Probably because there are people in society who rub their wealth and fortune onto our faces and put us down. Those of us who are affected by such treatment tend to have our self-esteem being declined. But some of us DO take that Envy of others and turn it into Anger to drive ourselves into striving even harder to be successful in Life. I'm not saying it's an easy thing to ain't. As cliche as it may sound, in the end, we have to find our own niche in Life and THAT is not impossible.

In public, I bet most of us watch the world go round and witness happy people who act like they've got everything going well for them and we tend to say to ourselves ,"Hey, I want that person's life. So ideal. *While looking at ourselves in a bit of disgust*". Most of us probably had thoughts about committing suicide because we think we're not worth living on this Earth. Why is that? Is it social pressure from peers that put us down and brag about how well they're doing in Life because of the right choices they've made in Life? Or maybe it's because we're not happy with our family background which makes us feel displaced around people who are pretty much well off?

As I'm writing this, I'd like you Readers to know that I am facing a struggle which I'm sure does not make me the only one. But up to this day, I refuse to admit defeat (Even if it kills me). 2014 was indeed a horrible year for me, but I found that to be a form of blessing as I'm trying my best to overcome situations that pulled me down so hard that I wanted to give up everything. I guess that's what makes us human, doesn't it? I should learn how to dust and pick myself up, no matter how hard the fall can be.

I guess it takes a very hard blow (and a knock on the head) for us to get even stronger each day. It's just a matter of how bad we want good things to happen. Having said that, I think mixing with very good company does help a lot. Not only mix with positive people, but with skeptical people who care enough to suggest us options that we can tailor-make ourselves to go about Life and make decisions that would land us in a proper position. 

I remember driving myself and dad to mamak for supper one night and I asked him this ,"Pa, when you were alone in KL and never knew many people then, how did you know you were going to make it in Life despite not having many 'roads' to take at the time?".

He told me ,"Son, if a beggar could survive out in the streets, I believe I can do so much better than that!".

Those wise words really stuck with me till today, which I'm grateful. But to have the loss of both parents is something I'll have to cope with at my own pace as I go on with Life. As much as I appreciate the people around me who have been giving me a kick in the ass to perk me up, I guess Time will help heal these wounds for the most part. I am my own man, I'll handle it as best as I can. I've seen and felt pain & suffering enough times for me to finally grow tired of wanting to give up this Life. No matter the suffering, not like it was the first time. Time to surround myself with friends, family and peers who care for me.